The happiest time of our marriage was when she worked full time at night, and I ‘d clean up a bit as soon as she left, and then I ‘d go to my mistress(es) house(s) and have lots of sex and good times, and make dirty dishes there, and mess up their beds or go out to eat or … So I never stayed home long enough to make a dish dirty or mess up the bed. I did the laundry & put mine away and hers & I loosened the already made bed ( I could never make it as tight and perfect as hers.) and she was nicer to me than any other time in the marriage. I will repeat this, to stress the importance: My wife and I were happiest when I was never home to make a mess, cleaned quickly as soon as she left and then went to my mistress.

I read through how inept these men are and I wonder if they are so incapable, how do they manage to hold down jobs at all? Try “I forgot” at work multiple times and they would be fired, same with doing something and messing it up so they don’t have to do it again. They would be fired.

So don’t believe all this men’s psyche, can only focus on one task rubbish.

The real reason is they don’t want to do it. They want you to do it. So they will play every game to get you to be quiet and do it. It is just disrespect and selfishness on their part.

1. These tips were probably meant as a joke.
2. Withhold sex and food and you’re just stabbing yourself in the back; he’ll probably go elsewhere.
3. Go easy on the nagging and he’ll be more likely to help out.

And, for the record, if you can’t see the qualities that made you want to be with him through his bad habits, why are you still together? You have bad habits too, and poor qualities – all humans do – and he looks past them. Why can’t you do the same?

My hubby can be really messy… I can too… That’s life!

Grow up and deal with it already!

And, most importantly… COMMUNICATE!

I hope my future daughter in laws (if I am lucky) forgive me for their messy ways and realize I have been saying pick up your underwear so much that I developed the “Not in the basket no washing available”

That being said… they make me laugh and they are my biggest fans

Lets also stop with the long suffering speeches “I work 40 hours a week and then come home and do all the cleaning and cooking and he/she doesn’t do anything.” How many times do you reckon that for every one of these people bellyaching about how they do “all” of the cleaning regarding their significant other leaving clothes on the floor or dishes in the sink couldn’t say the same thing about them regarding taking out the trash or shoveling the driveway? That said there are some people who find themselves in some kind of freak show hoarder filth sort of situation and to them I can sympathize presuming they really weren’t that way before living together and there really weren’t any indications but I can’t honestly believe that this is reality in anything other than the slimest of cases.
As for the idiocy I see some of these (admittedly) old posts advocating like throwing their toothbrush outside because they didn’t put it in the holder…really? I’m going to say without doubt I would much rather live with someone who left their clothes on the floor or didn’t do the dishes as often as I’d like, or never took out the trash or rarely did the laundry than with a nagging harpy or a passive aggressive jerkoff.

Incidentally from a male angle I can say being passive aggressive is the worst damn thing you can do most men would rather be screeched at and have stuff thrown at them than put up with that. I don’t know about women but there it is..I do wonder though, there is something to my mind regarding the people saying “men just don’t care” regarding clutter and the like, maybe that would explain why there are fewer men bitching about “slovenly” women than vice versa? Just a thought.

I don’t have any kids so I won’t speak on that, I have however been in the position of spending more time at our apartment than my girlfriend and thus doing more of the “work,” for awhile…again stop the “Oh the HUMANITY” woah as me complaining. Now I’m not talking about someone leaving food encrusted vermin attracting stuff around the house or wiping their damn ass on their hands or whatever the hell but lets be realistic most of us don’t dust every day, we don’t vaccum every day, we sure as hell don’t do the windows every day; as for the laundry oh hells bells it took me maybe a half hour to an hour every other day depending on how often I did it, during which time I could wash the veritable mountain of dishes that had accumulated since yesterday…on the very worst days I might have two hours worth of work to do (not forgetting of course that half the dishes were mine, I was eating half the food and wearing half the laundry by the way) a couple of days a week for those who don’t have kids I sincerely doubt you’re in a much different situation.

As for the aforementioned crap about leaving his shoes next to the sofa or leaving her toothbrush out of the holder; again we’re not talking about them blowing their nose on the sheets or wearing the same clothes until they have to be cut off. These aren’t issues even worthy of being listed as “slovenly” these are pet peeves and if your significant other has to listen to you gripe and complain or worse yet put up with some passive aggressive nonsense for who knows how long then I’m willing to say that they are the ones who are getting the worst of it not you.

Now I’ll admit that I’m not the worlds cleanest guy, I readily admit to clutter ie a stack of notebooks with some mail thrown in and a few books for the hell of it taking up a corner of my desk and what not and personally I loathe bothering with dishes that someone couldn’t at least rinse off when they put it in the sink but thankfully I don’t have to deal with that. What I do have to deal with is my girlfriend hanging stockings and bras all over the bathroom, leaving her underwear and what not on the floor next to the hamper and a small multitude of similar little quirks.

In the end however she’s also out of my damn league looks wise, is very intelligent, has a cute little hiccup thing she does when she laughs that makes me smile, plays video games with the best of the guys and is loads of fun to fool around with.
If I was to ignore all that and grouse because I have to pick her clothes up off the floor, do all the car maintenance, take out the trash or can’t reach out of the shower without knocking a half a dozen bras on the floor when I’m trying to get a towel off the rack, have little space on the bathroom counter or do the laundry a little more than I like then I would be a whiner and wouldn’t deserve such a generally all around great woman in the first place…a few extra hours of negative crap a week for a whole hell of a lot of positive is well worth it to me and if it isn’t to you or the ratio is skewed for you then again remaining in that relationship is on you so deal with it or get out of it but don’t be a nag, or treat them like children, or be passive aggressive and try and use the justification that “if they’d just do what I want then I wouldn’t be doing this” because that is a lousy justification for your own behavior that is every bit as bad as theirs.

And NO, guys being slobs is NOT a minor thing. Because it’s never just one thing that’s out of place. It’s lots of things, all over the house, and in some of the dumbest positions and for the dumbest reasons. Five steps away from an open trash can and you leave a wrapper on the countertop. WHY? What is the point of that? You left poop splattered all over the inside of the toilet and God knows you never clean the bathroom, but the brush is right next to the toilet. A reasonable person would say “Gee, I just made a big-ass mess, maybe I should clean it up,” and would scrub away the mess, because even if you don’t care that your girlfriend or your wife has to deal with it, surely you would be embarrassed if company came over and saw what a pig you were. You know what it means when you ignore this stuff? It means you think you’re a freaking prince who deserves to take up more space in the world than anybody else, and that you deserve to be waited on hand and foot. You don’t have the bloodline to think you’re such a prince. This is why we can’t get equal-pay laws passed. Because it’s mostly men deciding whether those laws get passed and if we could suddenly get paid the same as you, we could live without you, and you’d be stuck rotting in your own filth.

I’m sorry. The crazy thing is, I love men. But I do not understand this. I have actually witnessed men having the gall to say that their girlfriend or wife wasn’t being a partner. It’s not like a whole lot of YOU get how to be a partner, either.

And what’s even more infuriating, you know what people say when they come over and the place is a pigsty? They will never criticize you. They will think badly of *her*. Yes, even now in the 21st century. She knows this. All women know it. It makes the situation that much worse.

We have better things to do than pick up your socks for you. We have our own jobs, hobbies, occupations, kids to raise, gardens to grow, etc. We don’t have time to be at your beck and call when it’s too much trouble to get the wad of paper into the trash can. Get it yourself.

I do not get why this is so tough to figure out.

“While HE is out working ALL DAY at a job he likely hates why should he have to come HOME to this ABUSE?”

I don’t know how things work in your house; maybe y’all are lucky enough that only one of you has to work outside the home. In my house, we both work full-time. And if I work the same amount of hours outside the home, I expect to work the same amount of hours inside the home.

My husband-to-be is a grown man. I shouldn’t have to patronize, punish and plead with a 30 year old man to take basic care of his home and hygiene. That’s not good for either of us. But let’s not be drama queens here. The tips above, while foolish and shallow, are not abuse. Being asked or expected to pull your own weight around the house is not abuse.

And speaking as a woman, who has been on the end of actual abuse from men, that kind of talk coming from you would be like me complaining about the effects of racism to a black person. So shut it.